Expedia Booboos! =D

Pax wants to use partial payment option:
"You have two options. One, would be to pay for the package in full with one credit card and two, would be to pay for the package in full with two credit cards. So actually, you only have one option."
Syanga naman!

"...you must bring a valid government photo-issued ID."
Hindi po Kodak ang nag-i-issue nyan!

"You have to bring a valid government-issued photo ID, issued by the US government."
Tama na sana eh...

"Gusto ni pax mag-book ng shuttle sa Shatel (Seattle)."
Wala na kong masabi...

"Siyam sila. Yung walo, manggagaling ng Seattle. Yung dalawa, manggagaling ng Milwaukee."
8+2=?
Lulusot pa talaga sana sya nung pinuna namin yung sinabi nya!
"Hinde.. Kasi pala, 11 lahat ng pasahero!"
It still doesn't add up.

"Who am I speaking today?"
Ano daw?!

"That depends on what you agree with to the airline."
One preposition at a time lang sir.

Closing spiel:
"Thank you for calling Direct T..."
Expedia po. E-X-P-E-D-I-A!

"Would you mind if I place you on hold for a long time?"
Yes, I would mind.

Customer is checking status of refund.
"What I can see here is that it has already been forwarded to our processing department. And our processing department is already processing your request."
So tell me, has it been processed?

"The flight was cancelled in behalf of the airport."
Parang hindi ko gets.


"Your departure flight has already been departed."
There are no words...



While giving the airline confirmation code:

"B for Bictor, B for Boy..."
Parang walang difference.


"Do you already have a hotel on your mind?"
Hindi kaya nabigatan ang ulo ni pax?


"I see that you has have had a schedule change."
Sigurista! Lahat ng verb, ginamit niya!


While transferring a UGC deposit case to her supervisor:
"Please deliver 50USD coupon."
Aba! Tama bang gawing UPS yung sup mo?!


Agent: "Ma'am, it's not showing the price of the ticket."
Mentor: "Check mo, maybe it's an infant."
Agent: "Ay hinde, tao po siya."
Ano ba to, anak ni Janice?

"Pwede ba tayong magsend ng fucks copy ng itin? Kasi nasa airport na siya ngayon at lilipad na siya sa hotel."
Si Darna ba ang customer mo?

At nag-attempt pa siya to defend himself.
"Eh anong mali dyan? Tama naman yung fucks ha. Fucks naman talaga ah. Fucks!"
Oo na, fucks na.

"Don't worry. The support of the team is in you."
Grabe, pasan niya ang daigdig.

"May I have your e-mail address and phone number for future reference."
Talagang future reference?

"What I can see here on my end is that I cannot pull up your reservation."
Ayan naman eh!

"I see here a flight from Monique (Munich) to Shikeygo (Chicago) and then to Omaha (pataas ang pag-pronounce ng MA sa Omaha)."
Kanya kanyang pag-pronounce na lang. Walang pakealaman.

"The seats assignments will be assigned upon check-in."
Andaming seats!

Supervisor talking to agent:
"Wait lang. Just place the customer."
Where?

"I was able to put you in a plight leabing Ban-Q-ber..."
Naman!

"Do you have an e-mail address?" Customer may have said, yes. "Okay, great! Fine! Fantastic!"
I'm alive, alert, awake, enthusiastic!

"Okay ma'am, if ever we're going to purchase you this flight..."
Mejo naguluhan ako don.

"Thank you for calling Expedia, okay. You have a good day. You have a safe trip. Enjoy your vacation."
Wag mo naman ubusin sa isang customer ang closing spiel mo.

"So what I see here is that your airplane is not operating."
You can actually see the airplane?

"Your flight cannot be cancelled except for extenuwasting circumstance."
Ü

"I already talked with my supervisor and I told them that you book with Expedia very much."
Thank you so very many.

"When are you travelling to, mem (ma'am)?"
Ano ba talaga?!

"If you are going to change your flight then you are going to change your flight."
Aba, malamang!

"If you are travelling with three kids, the airplane will make sure that the kids will sit on you."
Ano to, jeep?

"If there are no confirmation email from Expedia about a flight schedule change, you are definitely free to go."
Galing syang Bilibid?

"We do have a lot of available here."
Ahahay!!!

"Hi, this is *bleep* prom Expeja Trabel. May I transper me with reissue desk?
Kaya niya eh! Self-service to the highest level!!!

"Okay, let me just go ahead over the notation."
Ano? Anlabo...

"This is your trip to Ohaw (Oahu)."
after much scrutiny...
"Uy sabi ko Ohawu hindi Ohaw!!!"
Syanga naman. Sorry. My bad. Ü

"Normally the hotel hab that promotion and they will honor you por that."
Because you're the queen...

"Here's what I am going to do in my end mem.. I will pull up the abailability and if we already pound the abailability that already suits your need, then we will book that abailability mem."
Abailability ng anorn?

"May chicher ako dati, mahilig sa Kilawin. Yung mga row foods."
OC sya ano? Kelangan talaga nakahilera yung food.

"Your flight was changed to Northwest flight 5-SEX-91."
Katabi mo lang ako, puro sex na nasa isip mo. Ü

"Kelangan daw i-reissue yung ticket." - Agent
"Sino may sabi?" - Mentor (asking which airline advised her this.)
"Si John." - Agent
Ay, close kami ni John! You know, we tight and shit.

"George, may I have your name please?"
Malay mo naman, may iba syang name.

"Let me gave you your itinerary number."
Present and past tense ito.

"Is there anything else that I may speak with you?"
Grabe! Ikaw na!!!

"Schoolmate ko si sya dati." - Male agent
"Sa all-girls school ka din nag-aral?" - Supervisor
"Oo. Transfertite ako." - Agent
May sarili siyang dictionary.

"You had seven attempt on booking this reservation and on that seven attempt, it does not went through."
Need I say more?

"I already made the schedule change and I already accepted the changes in my behalf."
Now that's accountability!

"Hoy ano ka ba?! Bawal yan! Hindi yan non-spiel-proof!"
Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.

"Enable for us to lessen the amount, I will drop a 25 dollar coupon to your account."
In order gid ya...
"Sabi ko in able, hindi enable!"
Gani!

"Gusto ko lumipat sa Expedia Corpse!" - Agent
Wahahahahahahaha, hwg mu nmang patayin anu kba!

"I just need to get an assistant from my support."
Ano? I'm your support and you need my assistant?

"Let's eat tapsi a while ago."
Ano bang time zone ito?

"If that's the customer want, the customer is always right."
Sige lang. Pagsama-samahin natin ang mga kasabihan.

"Dallas Fort Wear"
...Apparel ??

"My last name is Ismeet. S-M-I-T-H. Ismeet."
Naman!

"Marissa, are you pront desk?"
Ika nga ni Liza, "Tao po siya."

"On the way na siya papuntang George Boos International Airport."
Sumakay ako ng bush kanina... Ü

"I understand what you're coming true right now."
Dream come true ito.

"Okay, are you willing to wait for an hour? 'Cause as of this moment, there's a long call of volume."
Wala akong naintindihan.

"So your son is 12 years of old."
Hindi. He's 12 years age.

Customer's name is Masakasu:
"Thank you for waiting, Masuka."
Wala namang babuyan ng customer name...

"I need you to cooperate with me. I need you to be bot hands with me."
What does this mean exactly?

"I'll vi frobiding you a repund."
Keber sa alphabet!

"I put hair on a great seat near the door."
Baka naman mahagip ang hair ni pax!


"I can put you on a window."
Bat di na lang sa wing ng plane?

"He wasn't able to take his flight or he wasn't able to took his flight."
Tama na sana eh, binawi mo pa!


"...this is automatically auto-generated."
He was just wants to make sure na naiintindihan ni pax na awtomatik ito.


Agent's answer in his assessment:
"I would like to advised you that US policy in extenuating circumstance for medical reason, confinement to the desease must be one year within validity of ticket."
Penalow! Ü


"I don't feel comty here."
Coming from the root word, comtortable.


"Am I speaking with the front desk?"

Hala, iskeyri!